She said

She said I was everything he wasn't 

She said I stimulate her in ways he doesn't 

She said she can't wait for her time be alone with me

She said I listen and pay attention to the things he doesn't see

She says all these great words to me but I'm here alone and she must get home to he.....

obeservation

If I initially approach her and shower her with compliments show up with flowers in hand open doors pull out chairs and be the perfect gentlemen I will be viewed as extra and running game. If I keep the convo general and basic discuss work and CNN and my degrees and accomplishments then I will be viewed as boring uppity and see centered also seen as making myself out to be more than I am. If I initially hit you inbox with what's ya name bra and panty size etc I will be viewed as thirsty. Now here is where the shit gets interesting so follow me closely. Attempt number one was genuine and not appreciated simply written off as a joke. Attempt two was a chance to see if maybe her response to attempt one was a fluke and maybe just maybe we can connect on a intellectual level. Attempt three came about as a result of her horrible handling of attempts one and two so hell I might as well go for the pics and see if I get lucky while I'm at it. The saddest observation of all the situation is that she fails to acknowledge that her actions or lack there of will affect the that he approaches women from that day forth. Something to think about ......

ABC's of Me

Mainstream America does a terrible job of attempting to define me. The stories of hood fame and glory are just a piece of the story. Regardless what heard or think you know nobody can tell you about me like me so open ya mind pay attention and listen as I share with you the ABCs of me. A- Asshole not by choice but after some of the things I survived and often finishing last while being a nice guy you to would see why beings a asshole keeps me out the way. B Brilliant I am a fast learner well spoken and retain information very well C Cocky conceited and controversial at worse. If I ain't my own motivator how can I expect you to pay attention and controversy well that just come with the territory. D dreamer. I have ideas that could change the landscape of life as we know but till I get my money up I keep dreaming. E enticing I can be quite catch to be had and once you get a glimpse you stick around just to see how much more you can handle F Father my kids are my world and for them I will do anything and even though I biologically have two I make it my business to stand in the gap for other peoples kids praying all the while none of them grow up and do the stupid shit I did G greedy I never am content with the bare minimum I want more H hustler whether legal or illegal being broke is not an option I don't glorify illegal shit but reality is I know how to survive by any means necessary I interesting hell sometimes I impress myself so I'm sure I can make you think a bit J just I tend to call a ace a ace and a spade I don't live in a fairy tale world that makes excuses and justifies everything to my benefit K King as I know I descend from such I must remind myself daily that I am a king and conduct myself as such L Loving to those causes and people I deem fit for my love for you there is no limit to what I will do M misunderstood for many years I kept some of my greatest personal assets locked away followed societal norms and did tons of stupid shit to fit in when in reality I'm a need I just was exposed to a variety of street life at a early age and it stuck cause it was easy N nasty far beyond the age of bragging on sexual accolades but if ever have or had to opportunity to know me in such a way you will agree hahaahah O opinionated I have always been a outspoken militant guy and it often gets me in trouble but that's the only me I know to be P prideful though I have made many questionable decisions over the years I take pride in the little but of integrity that is left to be associated with my name Q quarter For many years I have used a quarter of my potential a quarter of my skills and a quarter of my talents o what at day it will be when I focus 100 percent of me into one thing at a time. R realistic I tend to enjoy reality no matter how ugly it can sometimes be. Besides lying and creating alternative reality requires too much micro management S strategic though no plan is full proof and most things never go exactly as planned going into any Thing without any plan at all is foolish. T tough as we all should be because as the saying goes only the strong survive. U useful whether it is small task or large ones I am never dead weight I can be of some help somehow. V victorious in 27 years I have fought with some demons and situations head on with no help and to be standing here free and alive to share this with you is a victory within itself W wise a old man once told me you don't get to be my age being a dumb ass. Wisdom has been defined as the application of wisdom. Daily I strive to apply the knowledge I have obtained to this point to minimize loss and frustration. X Xenolith noun a rock occurring in a system of rocks to which it does not belong. I bare a lot of similarities to my peers but if you look real close you will see I at times I don't belong. Y young though I grew up fast I am still fairly young at 27 and the best of me is yet to be seen. Z Zealous ardently active, devoted, or diligent to the continued growth of self the raising of my children and the building of my community. Now that I have shared with you the ABCS of me how accurate was your assessment when you first laid eyes on me……..

Dont quit

Todays society is ever changing. Politicians still lying and dreams are being bought every day. Sadly iI have given in and allowed bsBS and negativity to stunt my growth. Things now days are no longer taboo with that being said there should be nothing that stop you from becoming the best you. Never judge success or progress thru the eyes of another. Never allow some one elseelse's thoughts dreams or fears to guide your life. Choices and decisions equal success or failure but to never try gives you no chance to succeed. Whatever you want out of life go do it and never quit......

Confused

Sometimes the qualities and the things they admire so much in me seem like foreign language or a mystery its crazy really to me. On a daily i wake up and strive to be the best that i can be, Yet demons of my past constantly pester me i guess we got to see what future holds but i swear i reached my pinnacle at like 13 years old the rest has just been a mess i made shine like gold ....

I tend to live a crazy life that's probably why I don't have a wife but in the midst of all my bad I did just as much good. Exposed to reality at a early age all my life I simply wanted to turn the page. No need in running from the reality that is me cause everything I ain't made me that I am. As the days go by and time keeps turning each day I keep on learning ...

Complex

Truthfully I am nowhere the me I know I am destined to be. One side of me is about saving the community and being a positive voice to the next generation but that same voice is seasoned at manipulation and has often been used to manipulate women for money and sex yea I know this shit is complex. Never have I ever really had press up to survive my bare minimum of effort tends to be better than average yet I know that a focused me is nothing shy of great yea I know this struggle is complex. Doing my best left me sad confused and upset but while I was bullshitting I was happy had some change in my pocket and looked at my best yea I know this shit is complex. no man is without flaw and we all have our vices. I would probably be ready to kill somebody son if the ever introduced my daugters to the type of shit that I once did yea I know this shit is complex. Yet each day I arise focused on the prize that is yet to come while learning to choose my battles wisely all the while fearing none hoping that i enjoy sweet victory prior to a bitter demise. Hoping my gift is not also my curse and my deeds will be seen loved and appreciated by the universe yea I know this shit is complex....