Scars

Whether visible or hidden. Whether physical or emotional. We all have a few. A writer once said "Scars are there to remind us where we been but they don't have to dictate where we are going". Don't let the past control you in the present. Seems to me it be real hard to make forward progress while looking behind you ...

Dark Thought

Dark thought aint healthy but here lately its become common and necessary. After playing nice, being tactful and considerate with negative results it shouldn't be hard to believe my mind begins to entertain thoughts that are ridiculous and ignorant. Like what if each problem could be solved with violence like if it was ok to go out and just riot. Make a mess cause constant mayhem so they can know the angered state that I seem to stay in. To set fire to the institutions that trained us to be this way. Tear a hole in the set of norms they established and by the end of the war maybe see a brighter day. Sick and tired of taking this and that just cause. Being understanding simply because they say "that's just what he or she does". Angry to the point of destruction because the lack of honesty and loyalty is beyond disgusting. Caring not about the big picture at all just that I see the demise of every one and every thing that has wronged me in the slightest way then reality kicks in and I go on about my way ...

Well well well

Some where along the way I lost the interest and energy to exhibit certain feelings like empathy and sympathy because every time I do shit seems to end pitifully for me. Constant betrayal and repeated acts of contradiction have made it hard for me to care or even listen. Not to mention in my time of need the folks I help most be the first ones missing. its ok another lesson learned the hard way but change is on the horizon and doing shit from now on my way. At the end of the day well well well was all I could say

Time

So many quotes and famous references made to time and the management of such yet we still seem to waste her so much. On things and people who dont deserve it chasing a dream only to find out it really aint about shit. Time the most precious resource we have yet we misuse and abuse her so bad but soon as the shit hit the fan we so quick to say what we would do to have her all back ...

Welp

Moments that were once sacred are now tainted simply cause the whole truth came out. It was memorable and what I thought to be the breaking of new ground til your secrets were exposed and shut that down. Now what everything I found to be wholesome and cool destroyed by lies and make me look like a fool. Sometime u win some times you lose guess karmas a bitch in red high heel shoes.....

Accountability

We all heard it before the first step to solving a problem is admitting that there is a problem in the first place. Accountability is defined as : The obligation of an individual or organization to account for its activities, accept responsibility for activities. Accepting responsibility and acknowledgement are not one in the same. Acknowledgement is a great start but acknowledgement with justification and excuses doesn't equal ownership. Ownership is not a pity party either. I hate those victims that own the mistake only for sympathy, attention, or to soothe the other involved parties with no real intention of fixing the mistake. Growth and development require action to be successful. A man of woman who lack the ability to take ownership for their actions will never truly grow or develop to their true greatness. Excuses and justifications are the enemy of growth and progression. If you lie to yourself you will lie to others for sure. No matter what it is own it and proactively work on it til it is something you don't mind owning......

1st Corithians Chapter 6 Verse 12

"Everything is permissible for me"--but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is permissible for me"--but I will not be mastered by anything." I don't often discuss religion in any public forum but you don't have to be religious to follow me on this one. This section of the chapter is dealing with sexual immorality yet can be applied to any social setting and be equally beneficial. Growing up everyone said it, hell it was a weekly statement for some of us. If you dint say it you either lying or was a special case lol. What is this statement? I can't wait until I'm grown so I can do whatever I want. Even as adults when others tend to judge or disagree with our actions its a common defense; I am grown I can do what I please and I don't care who don't like it. Permissible is defined as permitted or allowed. By now we all know just because you can do it doesn't mean its good for you. People at the age of 18 and above are permitted to purchase tobacco. That doesn't mean that cigarettes don't lead to cancer and death. People 21 years of age and above are permitted to purchase alcohol but the consumption of alcohol in excess is linked to death or serious injury of people on a daily basis. Mom would always say what looks good to you isn't always good for you. Freedom is dangerous for some. Being allowed to or permitted blurs limits and overindulging can be the by product. Some things and or persons don't initially show themselves as non beneficial until its far too late. The person or thing used in excess usually is when it shows through as harmful and often times its far too late at that point. The writer also says "I will not be mastered by anything". I didn't interpret this as slave owner to slave type use of the word master but master as in control. We all talk about our independence and our ability to control what goes on in our lives but do we really have control? Sometimes we get so involved that we don't initially realize that we have lost control. Just because you weren't forced to do it or knowingly went thru with it doesn't mean you were in control. How many people do you think actively wake up and make bad decisions on purpose? Consistent events of poor decision making is usually a sign of lack of control. Whether its alcohol, drugs, sex or money we make excuses and justifications to appear in control. For some its fame and popularity that will have them living beyond their means merely to be accepted and viewed in a certain light. Its easier to justify things away then admit that you lost control. Choices and decisions or the lack of them usually determine the outcome of any situation. All things are not good for us simply because we can access them as we choose. Making choices and decisions that are beneficial to our well being is a great sign of being in control. You don't have to be a religious fanatic to find this particular scripture relevant or at worst thought provoking...