Screaming on the inside

Why are you so quiet today? The nice lady asked me but funny she used the word quiet. Its very loud noisy and chaotic at the moment at least inside my head. I respond I am ok just thinking. really I'm not ok. SCreaming fussing cussing crying and fighting all at once on the inside. Why you may wonder ha why not if you was me you would too. Thats the life for me these days. Bro got time my ace held by the feds only questions no answers lil sis struggling with the loss of the man she loved so dearly murded over bs it hurt like yesterday but its years old now just to name a few. But wait there is more I'm broke love life is non existant more responsibility than resouce and thats just the way its goes. Im not complaing tho just stating facts . I have found my niche in the midst of this choas and made myself at home. I probally wouldnt know how to function if things was any other way than they are. So even tho I am screaming on the inside I wear a smile on the outside............

Bad News

Bad news bad news bad news everywhere you look bad news. The phone ring bad news. Turn on the news bad news. Go to the mail box bad news. Good dying young elders leaving at a alarming rate whats next. Its all bad when your simply consit of seeing what bad news you going to get next. Really getting numb to the bad news starting to live a a life of nothing but bad news. They got the deck stacked and no hands coming my way wtf man bad news

DEATH?????????

I hate death but I know it s a destiny no man can escape. For me death leave scars unanswered questions, and a wealth of other issues.Yea I know we all got to go one day but here lately people leaving at a alarming rate. The demographics are all over the place young old good folks bad folks its kinda scary.Sadly some deaths are easier to accept than others. Sadly some are expected cause of the lives they chose to lead.They say you should learn something from you got thru but what is the true lesson in death? The deceased aint here to teach it because they the only ones that know. Some say death teaches us to maximize our days in the world and be hospitible and square all our affairs in the world etc etc... We can go on and on about lessons that death can teach. At times I am jealous of those that got called home . It got to be better than this bullshit we call life. Life minus chaos, lies, pain, bills, and all things negative no struggling and not a concern of any sort hell maybe death is a victory............

Let Me Be

Somethings and some people are just fukn stupid no way around it. Provoking a man with serious temper issues is not smart. Compare it to poking a sleeping tiger a stick. Whe he wakes up and rips ya head off dont cry blame yaself. Its stupid to be so concerned with your point being hears that you disregard all other logic in said situatons such as the feelings of the others involved and effected by your actions. I am from here now and here own assuming the role of that sleeping tiger. I aint fukn with yall so let me be and I wont harm you. Poke me with a stick if you want to but the response you will get you wont like so just let me be and avoid the whole situation. If you do decide to poke and provoke me save the victim bullshit you cant control my rage cause has you never poked me to bgin with we wouldnt be in the situation to fukn begin with ...........